Art of Disappearing – Ajahn Brahm

Just finished one of Ajahn Brahm‘s books, the Art of Disappearing, and since I keep thinking about it and I have a chance to toss some quick notes (mostly quotes from the book) here, voila:

“We expect and ask impossible things from this world”

“By practicing and deepening your meditation, stage by stage, your sense of self, your ego, starts to vanish…monastic life is set up for you to disappear..And as you practice your meditation, you see that when even a little bit of you disappears, you have more peace, freedom, and joy.”

“In meditation, when things get still, they disappear.”

“…it’s useful to practice skillful means like anatta-sanna, or nonself perception. It’s very clear in the suttas that there’s no such thing as a self; indeed, that’s basic Buddhism. In scientific journals, too, psychologists tell you that there’s no self; it’s just a construct…It follows that an arahant gets into jhana very easily and that even the anagami, a nonreturner, does so without problems or difficulties.”

Wikipedia has a neat entry on anatta-sanna, here is a small part, “If the word “soul” refers to a non-bodily component in a person that can continue in some way after death, then Buddhism does not deny the existence of a soul.^[4] In fact, persons (Pāli: puggala; Sanskrit, pudgala) are said to be characterized by an ever-evolving consciousness (Pali: samvattanika viññana),^[5][6] stream of consciousness (Pali: viññana sotam;^[7] Sanskrit: vijñana srotām), or mind-continuity (Sanskrit: citta-saṃtāna) which, upon the death or dissolution of the aggregates (skandhas), becomes one of the contributing causes for the arising of a new group of skandhas. However, Buddhism denies the existence of a permanent or static entity that remains constant behind the changing bodily and non-bodily components of a living being. Reportedly, the Buddha reprimanded a disciple who thought that in the process of rebirth the same consciousness is reborn without change.^[8] Just as the body changes from moment to moment, so thoughts come and go; and according to the anattā doctrine, there is no permanent conscious substance that experiences these thoughts, as in Cartesianism: rather, conscious thoughts simply arise and perish with no “thinker” behind them.^[9] When the body dies, the incorporeal mental processes continue and are reborn in a new body.^[4] Because the mental processes are constantly changing, the new being is neither exactly the same as, nor completely different from, the being that died.^[10]…Neuroscientists and philosophers of conscious have started incorporating the notion that there is no self in to current theory with Daniel Dennett being a well known advocate of this position in his theory of consciousness.”

This one is taking some thinking for me. I am thinking are we all like a part of an ocean, the waves are showing up and changing constantly and everything being a part of everything (literally we are all a swarm of molecules and energy) there is no one separate self.

“You just watch and gather the data…We all have our escape strategies. But remember: when you use those escapes, you’re not learning anymore; you’re just wasting time. It’s important to observe your reactions to things. This practice is wise in itself, and it develops further wisdom; it helps you go far deeper in your meditation. Whenever anything comes up that is unsatisfactory – that’s when you observe…and gather data because you want to understand…to learn from your experiences…Here is the data for insight, the dung for your garden…you don’t own them. You don’t escape from suffering on a retreat; you face it and disengage from it.”

“Be with [frustration] for a long, long time, until you know it thoroughly. When you do, you become free from it.”

I think it’s important to add you are doing that with a lot of compassion and non-judging.

“Always remember that it’s not that you can do it [meditate]; it’s that you aren’t getting in the way. The process happens when “you” disappear. When you’re demanding, you are there. When you have ill will, you are there. When you have craving, you are there. When you have boredom, you are there. All these things create a sense of self that thinks it owns thing and gets involved. You are the problem. And you can’t just go somewhere else: wherever you go , you take you with you. So everyone should disrobe: take off the “I-garment.” That which you take yourself to be, that sense of self, should leave and vanish. When the sense of you disappears, there’s no ill will or desire, because they’re part of the ego and the illusion of self. Then there can only be contentment and peace.”

“When you see clearly, you stop expecting things from life that it will never be able to give. That’s my definition of suffering: expecting from life what it can never provide. If you want too much from life, you suffer. You create that suffering with your expectation. When you understand the limitations of life and the limitations of your abilities, you know that all you can do is try your best to be helpful and not harm others. But even with the best of intentions, sometimes you won’t succeed. That’s life; you can’t do anything about it. A wise sensitivity to the world around you comes from seeing things as they truly are-seeing that the nature of the jungle is harm and suffering. Right now, we all have old age, sickness, and death latent in our bodies. This is the nature of our bodies. “

“The Buddha said that the amount of tears you’ve cried is more than all the oceans of the world (SN 15:3). You’ve died so many times that if you piled up all your bones, the heap would be greater than a mountain (SN 15:10)…Fortunately, there’s a way out…”

There is a concept in Buddhism that your consciousness can be released after the body dies and not return to a new body, instead stay out of the cycle of samsara and move into a great and beautiful other realm.

Thich Nhat Hanh playlist

I created this play list via Youtube of my favorite of his talks.  At about 33 minutes of the one titled Awakening the Heart, he describes how the tops of the trees blowing in a huge storm (look like the tree will fall) are like the mind in a strong emotion (like anger or fear); the base of the tree (look like the tree will stand strong deeply rooted) are like the abdominal area where you have deep breath. When in the middle of a strong emotion if you can bring awareness to your deep breath it transforms your experience. The emotion doesn’t last no matter what you do, if you do a mindfulness practice in that moment or not. He relates the concern about youth suicide and people losing themselves to an overwhleming emotion. Learning and practicing coming back to breath can save people from so much needless pain (the 2nd arrow). It is a great talk. The other two are shorter and also great. Please enjoy them. We are so lucky to have the chance to listen to talks on Youtube.

Brooks Palmer Clutter Busting with Mindfulness and Compassion

Brooks has been meditating for many years. His books have mindfulness all through them. He inspires you to see what your feeling tone is and what your stories are about your stuff – this clear seeing and compassionate approach takes you from where you are and creates empty new fresh spaces for the actual you to be in. He inspired so many old me’s and old stories about me to walk out the door (with the stuff going to goodwill). The stuff was holding the old stories that I had to realize just weren’t me anymore. Immediately the actual me had more room to be. His books are truly amazing. We are so lucky he picked this to do. I am so grateful for his approach and his work. Also enjoy his blog.

loka samasta sukhino bhavantu

Nearing my 400th yoga class now, I have fallen in love with this song often played by various teachers at the studio. Translation: May all beings (Loka) everywhere (Samasta) be happy (Sukhino) and free (Bhavantu) .

Here it is as sung by Girish.

Ending Conflict talk by Ajahn Brahm

Another excellent talk of his posted on youtube. He is not talking about bullying or worse, he is talking about general disagreements where people need to find a way to work together and get past things. I don’t want anyone to think its about staying in abusive situations, get out of those. I embedded it below my notes, quotes:

You have to know where someone is coming from to really empathize with them to respect your enemy. We have to meet with people we disagree with. And allow that disagreement to occur. And to realize the only way we can have peace and harmony, is to say yes disagreements are there but that is perfect to have disagreements. Because if you think they shouldn’t be there then conflict will always be there.

Unfortunately in the western world we have this terrible concept of justice which is revenge; an eye for an eye; seeking revenge and to punish. In Buddhism the focus is acknowledge you made a mistake, give forgivenss and strategies to work with to keep it from happening again. Punishment creates more conflict. If you’re a Buddhist karma will resolve it. No one gets away with anything there is always a sort of natural justice. That gives of the freedom to forgive and not to need to punish. Otherwise conflicts will never end if we think that the opponent has not been punished enough yet.

Instead Buddhism focuses on what strategies will work so that it will never happen again. Reordering priorities. Standing back and thinking what is really important. Being right is not that important, justice is not that important. Then conflict can be ended. Mostly they are based on ego: I am right. Ajahn encourages people to disagree with him so it can be worked through. “That would be terrible if people always agreed with me, that would be like a cult…if you don’t disagree with me I will get very upset, but not too much please.” LOL

Its not about you, its not about someone else, its about us. Change your priorities and you end conflict. Whose right whose wrong matters is the focus. We’re all always halfway in between somewhere of right and wrong. When we change the priorities where peace and harmony matter more than who is right in that moment, we end conflict.

Don’t keep bringing it up, let grass grow over it. Forgive. Let the us be bigger than the: I am right. The best result is that the “us” is healthy and strong. Let all that pain of the past go. Sometimes people send Ajahn complaints; he deletes those; he keeps the kind ones. Why not? It encourages him to do more.

He tells the story about a broken motor on a boat that is way out to sea. In the stress two people repairing the engine get in such a terrible fight one of them says I am leaving, literally packs their bag and shows up on deck. Realizing the idiocy of it through his rage. He goes back to work on the engine. There is no escape for us right away sometimes.

We realize that blame doesn’t really help at all. Its all about us, the big us that is important. Get those priorities right and we can have a very peaceful world. Don’t give up hope there is a path there is a way. Focus on the beautiful stuff, that is actually much bigger. Someone gets angry with you that is a short time, compared to the many times that it worked out. Two bad bricks is not reason enough to destroy a wall. We let that go.

Depression and Anxiety – Ajahn Brahm’s talk

See my notes on his excellent talk below. Here is the embedded Youtube video of the talk):

When you’re young you care so much about how people see you; in your 40s and 50s you let go of a lot of that, then in your 60s you realize no one was actually really looking, like people mostly don’t think about you, you know? We are all pretty worried about ourselves, or other things.

Egg farmers story – One Farmer takes the basket and fills it with the chicken dung brings it into the house, stinks up the house.
The other farmer takes the basket brings in the eggs, makes an omelette for the family and sells the rest for cash. We carry that dung around our whole life. When we look back on our life’s prosperity, we could see all the great things that are happening.

The bricklayer may focus on the 2 bricks that are out of line or the 998 that are right. Taking the good things for granted.

If you can remember what worked, if you bring attention to that in your mind, you can more likely repeat what worked. “You learn from successes much more than you ever will from mistakes and also you avoid this terrible trap of depression.” Remember the temporary nature of everything, that this too will pass. “Knowing its not going to last, takes away the pain.” When things are going well never take it for granted. You really work hard to make sure that prosperity lasts as long as it can. Always have to work. Keep working hard. That way the prosperous time will last forever.

We hear junk food all the time, criticism, all the things you did wrong. When you get a compliment you dismiss it. Why? We need to hear that, it is like health food for the mind. When you hear a compliment say Thank you I deserve that. Don’t dismiss it. The person giving the compliment will be glad you didn’t.

Receiving praise with thank you it encourages praise and otherwise what is left – the fault finding, etc. People have far too many desires and expectations..asking from the world what it would never give you. Australia will never win the world cup. [LOL, well that I don't know about that.] Keep your desires in practicality, don’t reach too far. When people do they get frustrated, depressed, angry seeing the world as a way it isn’t.

When you actually work within the parameters of life and you’re wise enough to know what you can achieve and what you can’t, when you don’t have these stupid desires, these obsessive goals. Which actually put you thru so much pain and suffering that you get depressed.

What is your goal in life? I am demanding my right to be celibate, celibacy rights LOL love it. You don’t have to win the match just enjoy the game. You get the promotion its more stress. There is never enough money. Why work so hard for the promotion when you can get it so your actually doing it for happiness. Status, what is that? Life sometimes does go wrong its not perfect, so don’t expect that. There are many times when loses happen and that is sad. So you accept there will be depressing moments in life, we don’t make anything worse of it. Joy at last there is nothing wrong with you if you get upset, if you cry, its normal, there is no perfect perpetual happiness in this world. It is so exhausting to be someone else. You can just be you. When you sit in meditation, you can just be you.

We don’t meditate to try to get something, we meditate to let go of things , that craving that wanting, to get something we want. Being here and wanting to be somewhere else, that is called suffering. Trying to get somewhere else, anything but being here, being you. Let it go. Just be who you are and then you find you have incredible energy, brightness, clarity.

Every time you want more money/something else you can’t enjoy what you have right now. Yeah when I get that thing, then I will be happy. Craving is unfaithful, promises you something but never delivers. 58:00-If you want to have a powerful body exercise it. If you want to have a powerful mind, keep it still. Bare energy of the mind comes from stillness. You get so much energy that depression just can’t exist. One of the greatest causes of depression is that people’s brain has just been working too hard. Make peace with your depression, open the door of your heart to being depressed. When you stop fighting energy starts to come back. When you are not getting negative about being negative. Don’t meditate with force, don’t struggle, let it go. Monks who have been doing it for years, are great at just letting it go. You know life has hard times it isn’t new or shocking it is just what it is in that moment. Meditation which makes peace, allows energy to come back.

Someone asks what to do when a friend experiencing depression comes to you. He says be sensitive, drop the plan, don’t show up with this book or this quote I used last time: what he calls knowledge. Be sensitive, sometimes an arm around the shoulder helps sometimes then they will punch you. As long as I am silent as long as I’m kind don’t try to repeat what worked last time or remember the instructions in the book. Whenever someone is really going thru something this is something he tries, dropping the plan, the knowledge and being sensitive in that moment. Don’t let knowledge get in the way of truth. Knowledge is what you’re supposed to do. Truth is what is right in front of you right now and there is a huge amount of difference. Be in that moment and be with that person and you actually feel what needs to happen in that moment.

Everyone gets depression big or small, its part of life. I think I missed noting many things in this talk (it may have been a different one of his talks): he advises volunteering helping people and he talks about being with people, like visiting someone in the hospice and their just not wanting to talk about their illness with you necessarily. Like don’t start with, how are you feeling. They want a friend someone who will talk to them like a friend, what is the latest, tell a joke, etc. Of course no absolutes it just made sense what he said that people get sick of talking about how they are doing to the nurses and doctors (that is their job) they want a friend also. He says don’t forget a person living with an illness is not the illness first, they are the person first. So it is not a depressed person, it is a person experiencing depression, for example.

Thanks Ajahn Brahm for this talk. Best to everyone.

Dharmmaseed talk on science behind mindfulness

Diana Winston describes, beautifully and simply, some of the thousands of studies on mindfulness.
She has many talks posted via Dharmaseed on the subject.